Such a happy person! Shes having the time of her life. I suspect she does this most times. Have the time of her life. The joy at the expectation of her dessert was wonderful to watch :-). And her running commentary as she eats! “Oh, is this the chef?” she pipes up. It is indeed the chef. And as he heads over to their table she starts clapping. Happiness all around.
She laughs from the next table and I remember her happiness. Perhaps now I understand it better? They’re getting ready to leave. Her son, who is also the husband takes after his mother. He is making jokes as he stands and stretches. Having dinner on the floor when you’re pushing what must be fifty cannot be easy. As they put their shoes on I tell him what’s been on my mind. They’re the happiest family I have ever met. He smiles, tells the waiter asante and takes his wife’s hand.
They walk down the stairs, following his mother. Pole pole.
I don’t love you anymore. I don’t care about you. You can do whatever you want and it won’t affect me. The most I’ll feel is a slight pang of something less than regret. It will disappear as quickly as it came and I won’t even notice it. It won’t affect me. I am no longer affected by you. Except when I come across your name somewhere. Or someone mentions you in my presence. I may feel my heart grow heavy. But it won’t mean anything. Certainly not that I still have feelings for you. I’m a lot tougher than that. I have moved on. Perhaps not all the way yet but I’m getting there. And your name no longer makes me want to cry. Or angry. Well, there may be short little bursts of anger when I think of you with someone else. But that’s your problem and it will only affect me just the tiniest bit. I may go to sleep that night thinking about you. Wanting and trying to hate but failing under the weight of the good we created, the heavy promise of a future together. But it will be gone in the morning. Coz I don’t love you anymore. I am no longer affected by what you do. I no longer sit for hours wondering why you left me. I have moved on. And I will not miss the little piece of my heart I left with you.